Genealogy

So take these words and sing out loud

'cause everyone is forgiven now

'cause tonight's the night the world begins again

Tonight I'm teaching on one of the least inspiring passages in the New Testament. We usually skip over it...but not tonight. The first 16 verses of the Gospel of Matthew record the genealogy of Jesus. Snore...right?

Here's the deal...the genealogy of Jesus tells me something about God. God enters our history right were life has found us. 

I need to hear that tonight and I think kids do too.

I've walked a long way and found that He is has arrived.

Just like he said He would.

Speaking of arriving...kids are...so I got to go.

The middle chapters.

Timing is everything.

Let fear or arrogance stop you from being somewhere on time and you'll miss something.

Push too hard too fast and you build a building without the indented foundation.

Work with calculated patience and passion and you will find, when the time is right, that you are exactly where you need to be with that very thing that fits your heart.

Every good story begins with the end in mind. The author knows the main character's heart and the story is all about he or she getting to the end.

But there is a middle to every story.

The middle, the most crucial part of the story, is jam-packed with the main character's not getting what they want. There is conflict and disappointment and heartbreak and struggle. There are days where they don't feel like getting out of bed or are tempted by something that would just end the pain.

As we know, some stories end that way. The character loses hope, the journey being too difficult, and they quit.

But then, there are others. Often these are our favorite stories because "our hero" has endured and has found themselves with a smile, a deep breath, surrounded by the souvenirs of the road behind them.

That is our story.

Right now, as I write, I'm listening to iTunes as it is shuffling randomly through over 2000 of my songs. As I write, Jon Bon Jovi is singing that "I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be". It seems that Providence is helping me write.

It's so easy to panic or get discouraged at certain parts of our story. We remember when things we good, when laughter came easier,  and look at our present surroundings and feel that our time is done.  The dragon seems to be winning and the prize is fading in the distance. We have a choice in those moments. We can throw in the towel and call it quits or we can pick ourselves up and keep walking into the hurricane.

Our heart's desire is on the other side.

I've written before about the struggle and I've written about waiting. I don't really like waiting and few of us welcome hard times, but when I look into my heart I realize that I wouldn't do anything differently. The part of my story where I find myself has put a few cuts and bruises on my body and there are chunks of my heart that will take some time to heal. I've been humbled in places and have had to remember my swagger, but I keep swinging because I believe.

I mentioned that Providence was helping me write...truth is, Providence helps me live. I find my day filled with clues on how to keep believing, keep loving, and keep walking. It doesn't change the passion of my heart...He simply guides me with the fire that burns in my chest. He has taught me to believe in the last chapters of the story but that there is a whole lot of middle.

There are foundations to build now. I might not get exactly what I want, but I as I follow His heart and focus in on the call I hear, I will have exactly what I need.

But for now...I'm still somewhere in the middle...and walking.

hardcore

So, tonight I'm thinking about those things that are at the core of who we are. It feels appropriate tonight sitting by the Hudson River, my new(ish) truck parked on the street behind me, and my heart filled with thoughts of loves not here. There is a lot of me present tonight.

But, for fear of digression, back to the core.

Our core is that part of us that all the rest hinges on. It's what gets us out of bed and gets us through the day. The strength of our core is what allows us (or hinders us) from doing extraordinary things.

You find out what is at your core when you take a hit.

Now, I have a few things I would consider at my core. There are people and places and things that make up the interior of me. I have found over the years that those things can shift and change.

The changes can cause tremors...

However, I have had to ask myself again recently, what causes me to keep going...what do I do and who am I at the very center of me? What is the lowest common denominator that makes it so I don't collapse in the storms or fall down like an off balance house of cards?

In so much of my communication I try to be subtle. I like to use word pictures to convey ideas and hope that your own spirit does what it needs to do with them. When we talk about something so critical as what holds us up, I feel like I want to show you all of my cards. We need something unchangeable...something so strong that it helps us be strong when everything around us is falling.

So what is my core?

Since I was a child, I've always had a sense of a foundation. My life has endured many changes from losing my dad early to divorce to heartbreak to financial challenges to moving to unfamiliar places. But through it all there was this presence. A belief, if you will. At times I've questioned and at times full-on doubted, but it never went away.

Through life, love, cities, children, jobs, and lots of walking, I've had a single core.

My core (admittedly though at times He and I have had words) has always been Jesus.

I am a man who follows Jesus.

I don't really know how to explain it...but when I've lost everything, I can still feel Him in me somehow telling me to take another step. When I fail He tells me to get up. When I hurt, He teaches me how to stand up tall, be a man, and love with all my heart.

Because it's in the walking and loving that we find what He has given to us.

Every good gift I've ever gotten is because I got up and walked in my core. I've taken many hits...but got up and walked. I wish I could take the credit...tell you I'm some kind of badass dude who is made of rock.

I'm not.

At the core of me is a heart that has been able to stay soft only because it's a heart that is held by a badass dude who has been my rock.

He is the reason I am who I am...at least the parts of me that are alive.

If you have enjoyed being loved by me...it's Him.

If you've been inspired from something I've said...I've been with Him.

If you see me tomorrow...

...thank Him

God knows I do.