Today, a friend of mine is going to college. I don’t really like goodbyes...at least goodbyes of people who I’ve come to love and whose company I enjoy. But there is joy in this goodbye because she is about to go change the world and come back a 25-foot tall giant. I write for her this morning because few people I know exhibit the qualities of the words that follow. Her determination in the face of pain or hardship or challenge is what will make her great. Thank you, Sophia, for what you teach. This is for you.
So, I’ve got an issue with Humpty Dumpty.
Maybe he wasn’t supposed to be on the wall. Maybe he was pushed. Maybe he had a little too much celebration with the other eggheads the night before (and why do we picture Humpty Dumpty as an egg anyway?). None of those things matter to me and they aren’t my issue with Mr. Dumpty. It’s the final line...
“...all the King’s horses and all the King’s men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty back together again”.
I understand broken. I understand falling. I’ve done both. What I don’t understand is lying there waiting for someone else to fix it.
I don’t understand not getting up...or at least not putting in some effort.
Now, before I sound like I have a hollow, heartless chest, let me say again that I get broken too. We all get broken and hurt deeply in our lives...especially those who aren’t satisfied with simply staying on the safe side of their lives and ascend what lies between them and the rest of the world...even if they know they might fall. Scaling walls makes people move from mediocrity to greatness. Falling is inevitable. Help is often welcome.
Quitting is never ok.
Hard times is an opportunity to see what stuff is underneath the shell of each of us. I think about each person who has climbed the ladder of greatness and inspired the world to take one more step. Each of them had to go through the fire. Each of them had to endure hardship. Each of them had to take their turn in the desert.
Sometimes the key battle isn’t the one everyone sees, but the one that is fought in the times that aren’t so glorious. It’s the discipline of moving forward when everything hurts because you know that you will be better.
I’ve often heard faith misread as waiting for God to fix everything. I do believe in God’s ability to fix what is broken in my life and I don’t ascend to the belief that the weight of the world rests on my shoulders. I believe that He wants to move quickly and doesn’t want me to hurt anymore that I have to.
I also believe he lets me hurt so that I can figure out how to get better...and stronger.
There have been many moments this season of my life that I’ve looked quizzically at the heavens wondering why key things in my life just seem to not be functioning. There are things I depend on to get me where I need to be. I don’t like being dependent on others, I like carrying my own weight and love to add what I can to the greater good of the community in which I run. I think being in love is great and have scaled that wall a time or two in my life. I enjoy hard work and have enjoyed being successful in my field.
As I look around, most of those things lie in broken pieces on the ground. In some ways, it could look like failure, that God has abandoned me or that I don’t have the ambition that it takes to get back up.
That would be a mistake.
What most people don’t see is that the the kings men aren’t standing around shaking their heads while I lie, motionless, praying for help. There is one man, hand scarred with the memory of his own broken, handing me some of the pieces I can’t reach and standing to the side when there is one that I need to stretch to reach myself. He knows it’s a muscle I will need for the next part of my open road.
We do live a life filled with bootstraps and angel wings. God has promised to direct our paths as we keep moving. Let me say again...as we keep moving. In the desert of our healing we gain wisdom, perspective, and blessing if we walk in the light we are given and not succumb to our own fear of falling off another wall. The next time we climb we will find that we are stronger, our balance is better, and our shell a bit thicker.
Beyond all of that...our love grows bigger because we gain the confidence that scaling walls and seeing bigger worlds outside and inside our hearts is where we belong. We know that even if we fall that we will be better. We will call from the top of the wall to other young eggs who think that this is all there is and we will reach down our own scarred hand to help them up.
Humpty Dumpty couldn't be put back together because he was an empty shell. You fall off a wall, you break, you start the painful and painstaking process of putting each part back together again. It’s not the job of any king’s horses or king’s men. But they are there...dispatched from the King...to hand you another piece.
But don’t just lie there.
Climb.
No comments:
Post a Comment